Motherhood introduced me to both the greatest joy and the darkest darkness I've ever known. When Edie was born, I had never experienced anything as intense as loving my child And then she began having trouble gaining weight, and I had never known anything as heavy as feeling like I was failing her.
And no one in my life understood.
Not even my husband--my poor husband, who took my tantrums one at a time as I tried over and over to latch my screaming baby. He tried to offer advice, but how could he know? He's never nursed.
But this group of total strangers, they took me in, even though I only had the courage to approach them through the internet at first. And they gifted me with the one idea I needed to keep going: it's okay that it's difficult. Let it be difficult and stop trying to act like you've got it under control.
If there's one thing I've learned about breastfeeding mothers since becoming one, it's that we're not proud to be breastfeeding mothers because we think we're better than mothers who choose other ways to feed their babies. We're proud to be breastfeeding mothers because it is So. Freaking. Hard. and we can't believe we're able to do it in the first place and keep doing it despite whatever obstacles are unique to our individual nursing relationship.
Thank you, mommas, for showing me love, grace, and knowledge from experience. Thank you for not laughing at my many questions and for making me feel normal when I thought I'd lost it. You validated me as a mother when I felt like I didn't deserve to call myself one, and I am so proud to have a place in such a sisterhood.
Full photoshoot coming soon!