We're starting a new series today, and I am so excited to share this first post with you! Rachel is both incredibly smart and ridiculously witty, so I have no doubt you'll enjoy the way she shares her life with us as much as I do. :)
-J
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Hello, all! Allow me
to introduce myself. My name is Rachel,
and I was Jordan’s college roommate! I
married my husband, Taylor, in May 2012.
As a semi-newlywed, Jordan asked me to write a guest blog about some of
the things I’ve learned in my brief experience as a wife. So here they are!
When we first got married, I was a stay-at-home wife for
three months before starting grad school at the University of Tulsa. Naturally, I did a lot of work around the
house during that time, because it made sense for me to do that while
Taylor was at work all day. Once school
started, though, I was putting in 80+ hours per week on school and had little time
or energy to cook or clean or do anything to keep the Savage home afloat.
Honestly, I felt like I was completely failing as a wife and
that Taylor would be frustrated with this new burden of housework. He rolled with the punches like a champion,
though. I will never forget coming home
at 8:30 one night during my first week of class and finding him in the middle
of a homecooked meal! (I am so sorry I
underestimated you, Taylor!).
2. Root for each
other’s football teams. Seriously, it
will make your Saturdays much more pleasant.
I’m learning to love burnt orange, and Taylor wears America’s brightest
orange with pride.
3. It’s okay to have
dates in your own house. Put your phones
and your laptops and your tablets and your carrier pigeons away and just enjoy
each other’s company. Conversation is
underrated, so sometimes just making time for conversation means so much more
than planning an elaborate and expensive evening out of the house.
4. Dogs are the best
thing that will ever happen to you. That’s
science.
Taylor and I adopted Scout, our 90-pound Golden Retriever,
two months after we got married. Then seven months later, fate brought Boo to my office and it was love at first
cuddle. Not only are these girls a
constant joyful presence in our home, but they force us to do more than just
sit and watch TV when we get home from work/class. We get out and walk, we take them to the lake
– heck, we even took them to the public pool once for an event!
Seriously, it is hard to stay mad at your spouse for very
long with these sweet babies bounding around and making you laugh. I wouldn’t trade them for the world!
5. If your spouse
hates a chore and you don’t, that should become your chore. This seems so obvious, but it actually requires
some communication. If Taylor and I were
both responsible for mowing the lawn, we would live in a jungle because I’m not
touching that. If we split grocery duty,
our fridge would be forever bare because Taylor would get lost in the depth of
Reasor’s and never return. The sooner
you learn to intentionally split these duties instead of passive aggressively
holding out on doing the dishes until your spouse caves and does them first,
the happier you will be.
6. Blending habits is
hard. Apparently it’s not customary in
Man World to hang up your towel after you shower. Or to load the dishwasher the “right”
way. Or to, you know, throw your
half-empty Dr. Pepper cans away. At
first, all of these Man World habits made me want to pull my hair out. At some point during the last few months
(this lesson took a while to learn), I started to realize that as long as the
dishes get done, it does not matter how Taylor loads the dishwasher. The thing to focus on is that I have a
husband who loads the dishwasher at all, and that is a Christmas miracle in and
of itself.
7. Be one another’s
cheerleader at all times.
Taylor is probably the most modest person I have ever
met. He will never, ever brag on
himself, which means it is my job to let the world know how awesome he is at
everything he does. Hilarious? Absolutely.
The best new hire Phillips 66 has ever had? That’s the word on the street. A loving husband and father of two adorable
dogchildren? Check.
I completed my first half marathon in November, and Taylor
stood in the 20 degree weather for two hours to literally be my
cheerleader. He is awesome.
Sometimes things aren’t so rosy, though. And it’s even more important to cheerlead
during those moments. When he doesn’t
get that promotion or when I am disappointed in an exam grade, it is so
important to continue to encourage and affirm each other.
8. Marriage has
helped me learn who I am. As cliché as
it may be, Taylor is truly the first person I have been able to completely be
myself around. This was not an
intentional thing, but the comfort level associated with marrying Taylor has
created an atmosphere in my home of open dialogue and silly songs 24/7, and I
love it.
9. It’s okay to do
things alone. As I type this, Taylor is
in the other room playing Call of Duty on Xbox Live with his buddies, and I’m
watching a basketball game that he has no interest in. And our marriage isn’t crumbling.
When we first got married, this would have been a signal
that something was wrong. Now it’s just
the way two introverts make time for themselves.
10. Make memories on purpose. Before getting married, Taylor and I lived
300 miles apart. We saw each other about
once a month, so naturally we couldn’t really get into a rut with how we spent
our time. Marriage is different,
though. Because we do all of life’s
mundane tasks together – brushing our teeth, doing laundry, taking the trash
out, and so on – it’s really easy to forget to be intentional about making
memories.
Taylor and I have played with monkeys, jumped off a
waterfall, been front row at Bruno Mars (Thanks, Phillips 66, for the free
concert!), been on College Gameday, dressed Scout up in a pair of jeans for no
reason, had a fun weekend getaway in Kansas City, and the list goes on. I’m looking forward to making 70 more years
of memories with this guy!
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