Happy Wednesday, friends! The middle of the week has become much more pleasant since we started our 10 Things series--I love reading what all of these pretty ladies have to say about life and marriage. And today is no exception! Kalyn is a sweet friend I made at OBU. She's currently in grad school and just celebrated her first anniversary with her husband Kyle, who you can tell really believes Kalyn is the most beautiful woman in the whole world (I'm not arguing with him!) by the way he treats her. :)
Hi everyone! My name is Kalyn, and I became good friends with Jordan while attending OBU. My husband Kyle and I got married January 5, 2013, so we just celebrated our first anniversary a few weeks ago! We just bought our first house at the end of November, and are really enjoying life together. Marriage is such a blessing, and I’m happy to share 10 things I’ve learned from it thus far!
10 Things I’ve Learned in My First Year of Marriage
1. Encourage each other daily.
-In marriage, and in life, you are going to have ups, and you’re going to have downs. You should be the first person to encourage your spouse, both in the good and the bad. For example, I’m in grad school right now, and there are days when I feel so overwhelmed with everything I have to do. Kyle is always the first person to encourage me, bring my spirits back up, and get me thinking straight and positively again. This is so important!
“Therefore encourage one another and build one another up…” 1 Thessalonians 5:11
2. Forgive quickly.
-Guess what? There will be times when you and your husband disagree, upset each other, maybe even hurt each other’s feelings. But you don’t have to remain in your anger and hurt. Talk about it, listen, and try to understand where the other person is coming from, and then forgive. And forgive quickly. As cliché as this may sound, life really is too short to stay upset with the love of your life, or anyone for that matter. Kyle and I just can’t stay mad at each other for very long. We have found that we are so much happier when we don’t. (This may sound like a given, but I think it’s something you have to realize. : ))
3. Be supportive of each other’s work.
- You don’t have to understand everything your spouse does at their job (Kyle is a credit analyst…trust me I don’t know a whole lot about analyzing credit.)But support him in it. I mentioned previously that I’m in graduate school right now. I’ll be honest, there are some days when I question myself as to whether I’m even doing the right thing career wise, whether I’m good enough, whether this whole grad school thing is worth it, etc. Thankfully, Kyle has been SO supportive. He’s so encouraging, and so supportive about what I’m doing.
4. Do things you both enjoy together!
-Life these days seems to be so busy. Busy with jobs, school, activities, just life. It’s important to slow down and just enjoy life together, doing fun things you both enjoy. For us, it’s things like watching the Sooners beat Alabama at our home, going to Thunder and OU games, playing sand volleyball together and more. Whatever it is that you both like to do, do it!
5. Embrace who you and your husband are together and don’t fall into the trap of comparison!
-We are all different. Different people, different couples. What works for others might not work for you, and that’s okay! Don’t fall into the trap of comparing yourself to other couples, thinking that what others have is better than what you have. It’s not healthy, and it’s not true.
6. Be each other’s venting ear.
-Sometimes, life can be hard. You might have a bad day at work, or someone might frustrate you. Be that listening ear for your spouse. And know that he’s that for you too. Whatever it is you need to talk about, or let out, you can do that in the private, personal safe haven of marriage.
7. Try new recipes together!
-Food is a part of your daily life. Why not make it fun and interesting together? We have tried so many new recipes together, and it’s so fun! Plus, it’s something to look forward to after a long day of work.
8. Be each other’s voice of reason.
-Sometimes it’s a good to have another person’s opinion, or level of reasoning when you’re not thinking so straight. What better person for that than your husband? Or you for him?
9. Exercise together!
-Exercising is good for you, so if at all possible, do it together! Kyle and I always feel so much better after a good run, and it’s something that bonds us together.
10. Enjoy the phase/season of life you’re in RIGHT now.
-In life, it’s so easy to look to what’s next. In high school, it was fun to look forward to college. In college, it was fun to look forward to graduating, and so on. However, it is so important to enjoy where you’re at in life right now. If you’re anticipating having children, that’s exciting! But don’t rush your life away. Enjoy the special phase of life you’re in right now, because you’ll never get it back. And God’s timing is perfect. So whatever phase of life you’re in, enjoy every moment of it, right now.
Thank you so much for sharing with us, Kalyn! Congrats on your first anniversary and new house :) You and Kyle are so sweet together!